Clear

Watch over me
Angel of Death
lit up the rising Sun
overthrow the endless night
ignite my eyesight
purify the fire of my heart
Angel for below
Angel for above
Angel for now and for the past
Angel from the stars
Angel of the resting ground
and every place
you chose to dwell
from white to black
from what is fresh and boiling  blood
to all that is to pass
the desperation of the walking dead
takes me through the darkness
this is your chance
Angel
at life
and it is mine
to take

*****

Pozostań ze mną
Aniele Śmierci
obudź wschodzące niebo
nie prowadź w nieskończoną noc
rozpal mój wzrok
oczyść mój pożar
Aniele stąd
Aniele znikąd
Aniele zewsząd
co prawe i lewe
co świeże i krwawe
co wiedzie mnie przez noc
co martwe twoje jest
i wszystko jasne
nie pomyl się
Aniele

 

English teacher

I hoped to celebrate a merry little Christmas together
sweet mystery night
in her arms

on that particular day, religion fell from the sky with snow
lit my imagination
life up North in general
feels like watching heavy clouds from a prison bus
didn’t think twice about it though

ran up the stairs
left a handwritten note on the door
quoted Shakespeare’s sonnet
saying
that so she was to me
as food to life
with its number 75 below

there is nothing wrong with
creating consequences that define your chances
with forming reality with energy to open eyes to reasons
and justifications
quitting the guessing game with emotions that make your heart race

She came home
found it and was elated
because she took 75
for JS
initials of her ex
but this sorry ass moved to London
I didn’t care
I was in Warsaw with spare time to leave notes
to my English teacher
fascinated by her presence
since sixteen but not puppy blind
awakened and ready for the conquest of every border that confined me

a week later we had sixteen orgasms together
within twelve hours of my first journey through her body
madly attracted to each other for a long time already
We agreed there was no way my train was not coming for her
I also laughed at her first misidentification of our relationship
75 was no JS
the second mistake being
a few months later she left for New York
to never see me again
I lied

I had seventeen orgasms
only two less than I had years
By twenty one I read everything by Shakespeare
and still didn’t understand why she stepped out
of my train
older women can become scared
of the cocoon of ten years motionlessly hanging between lovers
whatever they kiss with their mature lips
sooner than later turns into Spanish tragedy
in which
bullets fly
cocoon breaks
everything of value and purpose is suddenly
taken from Otello
Hamlet
Macbeth
Romeo
and the last American hero
in Chicago now
(guest appearance)
me

Psalm 2:1-3

1
Why do the nations rage
and the peoples plot in vain?
2
The kings of the Earth set themselves,
and the rulers take counsel together,
against the Lord and against his Anointed, saying
3
“Let us burst their bonds apart,
and cast away their cords from us.”

the non-human super-rich are the itch
I would like to scratch
break
every gate to hell on Earth they built

on my Lands and in my Seas
in my mind and in my eyes
in what I eat and what I dream of

the chosen by the devil

as the devil breaths through their deeds
breeds through the sins with their daughters

no peace
at borderlands to insanity

Divine certainty

who do you know
message from my guts tells me
matters

friends we make when dancing or bleeding
helping hands we shake when sober or stoned
women we seed or abandon to oblivion
it gets more interesting
all hell breaks loose
firefight intensifies as you breathe in
justice
freedom
peace

Now
who do you worship
on every day of the week
to make him know you exist
in this fucking hole in the ground
you were thrown into by sacrifice
and since the farm is getting shut
how do you proceed
in the limited landscape of possibilities
from the herd mentality and prosthetic blindness
from duplicating lies of the occult deities
to divine
certainty
son

 

Monkey vengeance

I am an animal
that’s what they say when they don’t understand
I could kill you with my bare hands
but I carry a knife for the sophisticated
reptilian pleasure of taking life
I could kill you with a hit of my naked palm
but I have a loaded gun to watch your fear
crawl up the walls and jump your eyes
pleasure my sick heart

will I take my meds
and carry on with the next episode
of human life on Earth
burry the hatchet
or will I soon find a way to your throat
slash the vein
skin you of voice with a sharp object
cover the ground
above garbage bag with a corpse inside?

can’t let my mind get infected with insignificance
of annoying parasite
you are
live
live human dirt
eventually
your fate will hit the wall
it itself built

Sanctuary

as you advised
I gave all to my craft
mother
don’t you ask for more
even translucent stars got tired of being watched
and the tower
brick by brick
is crumbling into elaborate torture in dreams so high
they suffocate history with barbed wires and the stench of death

tonight
nervous flocks of crows
flew off my face into the sanctuary of clouds
to watch darkness cover ground with ash
break the skies into a carousel of stage lights
in this Babylonian circus
we are the apes in
I live but I am not
yet
reborn

every shadow I feed  seems to grow wings
their flapping awakens storms
downpour of worries
we lived only in the past mother
cut off from the promise of what is to come
as our horizons were long captured
and our Suns
and our Moons are not visible
yes
childhood weeps at 
nothing left
but crush-lines and stench of burned fingertips
to guide us through the wasteland of gods
fall and rise
fall and rise under seeded clouds
I can’t see your face anymore
mother
your son was born
to piss away
all this love
I am sorry
for
mother

Stage

read the flame
if you want to put out the fire
lies are there
burning your mask to the bone
can’t you see?
every day silent overkill proceeds funeral choirs
son of man
pay for the discomfort you caused me
I have been waiting
slaughtering time for corrupt designs
hastily promised to bodies in dire need
of the eternal road


I refuse to regret milestones
slippery slope
mud we faced
to episodes of self-creation
my bad if the future doesn’t happen
the way we imagined the higher forces
as vampires came and went
what a joke
now conquered
I am willing to burn down the stage
we danced the macabre on
every trench of the last frontier
everything

 

Fate

come closer
I belong to you
like you belong to me
this time
I chose you wisely
my brother
my wild twin
my fate to nowhere

I chose you
before abandoning the safety of planes above
entering the abyss of dust
trying to again
change the prophecies into future done
fulfill another incarnation of never-ending self
fascinated with mortality
constantly running into an ambush of restless lives

I
fate
slaves to one another
we were bitten by the snake
taken prisoners
before we even had a chance
to save each other

numb
we are watching blood being drained from hypnosis
chaos spiral into orders of war
birds fall off the sky

what a deserted place of self-harm
with guns constantly pointed at brains trying to make sense of
manipulative disorder
while alien dead hand
one by one
is claiming certificates of belonging
mine of both
separate ways
to death

 

RIP

it is not that I am not dying because I don’t want to

ask my guts
scars prove I already did
the inner circle of the wrong and lonely paradise
patiently awaits signs of illness
fact
my heart did stop to look back
but came around and stayed to never rest
the truth being
I don’t know any acceptable last words
I could tell you a little story
but that’s not the case when you have only seconds left
before running away
for the good and bad of a world that never ends

I do not pretend to be rising
my shoes are more of a Fenix than I am
they walk in circles I only follow trends
you have no clue how many doors were kicked in
women used
money spent
how many songs have changed their pace
how many streets have faced moments of blindness
to never recover or to never find me a better way
so I am hanging out with myself in my shoes
for now
around and around
over the years I didn’t choose
but they count
God damn
they count
in the last symphonies of the great Universe
RIP

Victory

a sterile kiss on the throat
and you begin to sing your song
a side effect of your fears
make it last in me
after I let go of your beautiful soul

in other lost words
I am watching
“I love you”
a pocket of warmth surfacing
reaching out beyond
liquified nonsense
let me breathe it
let me get wasted on its sin
deep agony of senses
summer dreams begin to flow
open fields
of being released from bondage

your female body underneath responds
to my pyrrhic storm of momentary victory
I am walking on your clouds
released from your promise