Month: October 2021

a sterile kiss on the throat
and you begin to sing your song
a side effect of your fears
make it last in me
after I let go of your beautiful soul

in other lost words
I am watching
“I love you”
a pocket of warmth surfacing
reaching out beyond
liquified nonsense
let me breathe it
let me get wasted on its sin
deep agony of senses
summer dreams begin to flow
open fields
of being released from bondage

your female body underneath responds
to my pyrrhic storm of momentary victory
I am walking on your clouds
released from your promise

the children were so eager to become rats
imprisoned by the carousel’s swing
that they turned a travesty of the purpose of life
unless life had no meaning
and the sky only meant to look down
on scrap skeletons embedded  in quicksand

the coming wave will wash away
everything that built your love
made you belong
everything that kept you warm and safe
everything above and below that cared for you
forget yourself like other expendable heroes
in a fight for an early grave

nothing comes out of no place
but everything goes in there
tear
who needs this spectacle
when it always rains blood

you have become a scar on my face
young Jesus could have learned how to die in here
hell of human names
I know yours
sheep only do what the devil planned

run
run sheep
the shortest path to the lake of fire
my wars are won before the first shot
hits the chest of another worthless parasite
chasing its brother

I am watching the blue sky
yet burning inside
flame before ash
how did I lose myself
how did I morph into a soul who no longer wants to rest
flame before ash
worlds collide at the best time for a blood sacrifice
run

sheep
run

 

 

 

blessed be
ability to cope
with chronic me
stupid grim
on my face
when I hear myself
bark at hand

blessed be
sweet dream
condensed into flesh
here
sinner awakes
one breath away
from a certain death

the weather was kind this year
the clouds seemed all-natural
the rain outside had no bitter taste
and if all my wishes were to come true
I would irrationally ask for more predictable use of flood
as the unconditioned stimulus in our controlled environment
no
definitely not
can’t call it an experiment
Earth is a nice facility
a little flat
a little round
birds do exist
but my hand is not feathered
what on Earth
would the point be
of no return

I wish I had a fear of no tomorrow
it would make today more precious
ever-wandering me could stop and think
no further than the next meal
next sex
next paycheck from some authority
some social disease like the government

fear of no tomorrow
doesn’t bring peace
but it gives you a chance to live now
whatever now you can hunt down for yourself
or
whatever now follows you behind as yesterday
but it doesn’t really exist
the only thing you need to remember is to stop now
in the middle of the street
and talk to it
like it mattered to you
imagine now is your mother
never far
never a stranger
otherwise now
will be deeply disappointed
it will scream inside like a madman you are
and guess what
you need those lungs for breathing now
not tomorrow
today
try deep

the two of us
got tired of each other
especially me of alien him
God expired
but we can’t go separate ways
as we share the code to my body
hatchery overlords wouldn’t allow it
they need virgin birth
I need peace on Earth
I wouldn’t call it symbiosis
it is an uneasy truce
before all-out war
before I take a pill
to kill the parasite

how do I
born out of that crumpled night
conjure up answers to questions you madly asked?
how do I find your tears in the falling rain I deliberately seeded outside?
how do I turn yesterday into now and forever
as we planned
when together was still an option?
visions of us
easy to say
easy to play the light and shadow games
trading days for happiness or misery
pleasure or pain
insane
insane arrangement
everything remains caught inside
time capsule grows transparent
as desires fade into illusions