Fight

I had no choice but to go to war with who I am
starve my my body and mind
turn into a carbon gem of higher ground and purpose
and it is not a shadow it is real me of the past
that I fight
self-indulgent clown always beating a dead horse
breathing
dancing corpse
string puppet hanging idle on fulfillment and good times
that change
don’t think it will last beyond my life
but why not try the other way around
the inevitable crash
finally wake up
embrace the promise of getting one more day closer to end
the Sun is still high
to purify
what’s left