Author: admin

Does the Sun shine for the rainmakers?
for the designers of energies
emotions
for sculptors of behavior and words that morph into forms of landscape
living elements
stones
seas
wondering stars
wondering me
invisibility of time
and watchtowers around us?

magic
talk to me
how dark are you?

Absence of light and I since early childhood
the trials we endured together
the presence of guides
the silent confidence
the mirror sky and oceans to mysteries
I am tired of life
and life is tired of me
but what will it be when we separate from Creation
magic
how dark are you?

I  am not a number
not the One
not the Infinite Possibility in an endless matrix of outcomes
unless I lie
to you
and to myself
it is not something I could have avoided
being many numbers to many masters
owners of symbols and quantities
they count every rogue breath of mine
every twisted thought process
every crime of seeing and wanting too much
for my human kind

it is not that I am hypnotized by the promises of order
I was born into their lair
their feeding ground
and I still
do not identify as liability
or food to hidden parasites
so evident and irritating to my consciousness
is their constant running us down
and burning
in the Black Sun

when it is over
it is not over the ocean
over some hill
over the brick wall of another sleeping pill
it is closer
It takes over me
and I can’t ignore it
as if it wasn’t meant to coexist

look
woman
it is written in blood vessels
all over my stone-faced patience

of course, there is no forgiveness
just waiting around
thus I have been silent
rushing it wakes memories
nevertheless
I must leave you to another
fucking
boy scout

 

 

do jutra
przyjacielu
bo w jutrze będzie takie samo wczoraj jakie było w dzisiaj
zanim zaraz i już pomieszały mi zmysły
żebym nie widział różnicy
pomiędzy uposledzonymi kurtynami czasu

usiądź koło mnie
porozmawiamy o wykwitach  godzin na naszych twarzach
dłoniach i zębach
my
zwierzęta podddane naświetleniu życiem
mamy w sobie dużo do przemilczenia
w słońcu kolejnego poranka
nad przeszłością

czy nadal uważasz że horyzont
odradza sie dla nas?

***

see you tomorrow
compadre
because tomorrow
will become the same yesterday as we managed to live through today
before my mind
got all mixed up by Too Soon
suddenly here
till I couldn’t really tell the difference
between the stalking us
curtains of time

possibly just
sit next to me
we’ll talk about the blooms of hours on our faces
hands and teeth
we
animals exposed to life
we have
a lot to remain silent about
in the light of another morning Sun
over the coming past

new horizons
do you still believe they rise for us?

I forgot Elohim are born
and I forgot Star of Bethlehem is bringing them forth
one by one
offspring of light
into my realm
into my conscious darkness below
their heads glowing with golden rays
their lips
whispering words of wisdom
on murals
in cathedrals and caves, I have abandoned

anointed by loneliness
I watch Orion’s Belt reclaim their world
the only home I should have ever known
marked by the holy cross with the Pleiades
its stone already in space thrown at my prison
soon to be falling apart here on Earth
murderous plane
where humans
don’t make the best use of lives they get
and through death
they increase their chances of presence in Heavens
if not afraid of empathy and love
the swan songs from humanity’s soul

I do believe them
to be the Star Gate
and confession of faith

 

Awareness  of finality of each moment
and fully functional life are not lining up for me
I need to redefine the relationship with death

if I am to meet my end
on a day like this
quietly
when shift just happens
and my sense of danger is not truly awakened

if I am to move beyond the material form of abstract me
become a wave
to calm my storms and raging self-awareness

or maybe

Elohim
come as you are
I am an old soul
a veteran of life and its loss
guide me to Elysium
let me crave the sounds
of trumpets and horses
let me watch the harvest
and touch the fire of judgment

 

 

 

 

there is no way to measure how far I have walked
dragged my two feet on this long
empty road
away from you
away from the coast and days where the Sun rises
to that lonely place named Nowhere Near
being recovered
from fascination and hope

took only a few false steps to spend eternity on a trip
to regret I really live
a trip through my dreams
and all the way through the mist of time and space
to genesis
of what love was supposed to bring
somehow
the virtue of patience is killing my will
and
I am getting used to that annoying fear inside
of never touching your face
while always starring in the eye the fire I am
on you
and you only

sanity
let it burn
as everything does in the deep meditation of life
ashes to ashes are a promise we are pretending not to hear
and then
suddenly
our shoes are walked in circles by millions of strangers
and  in the process
we turn
meaningless and forgotten